Read CS Lewis' "A grief Observed" last night. It was good to be able to relate to SOMETHING. I don't think he had any main point, but it was reassuring to watch his thoughts crystallize into some kind of cohesion. There was nothing there I hadn't experienced. The only thing I didn't necessarily agree with was when he touched on his beliefs being tempered by his wife's death. Not that I'm sure it's not true, but it seems as if he starts from the position that was the reason FOR it, and then works out from there. On the other hand, he comes back later and confiscates many of his own positions; discarding some altogether and reworking others with more clarity and rationale.

   It is painful to lose a loved one. But I don't think there is any pain like losing a child or a spouse you are completely invested in. I think that pain must be similar on many levels. I feel that one day my in laws and I will share a strong bond. In a sense, we have understood pain on a different plain. You cannot invest love in anyone like you do your child. You can, over years of devoted love and care, and having children of your own together, begin to love another human being on that level.