the final movement

We're all trying to make these memories mean something to everyone; someone.
We're all trying to deify...
Chips of red baked on enamel, and
photographs' faces, and memories, that our grandchildren will forget about.
Our legacy is dust.


Dust.


I wanted to build a legacy for you, my love.
You built one for me.


And I...Have been tearing it down,
Destroy.
Destroy.
Bring the world to it's knees and burn the damn place down,
Cause you're not here to share it with.
I've been to the mall in Washington,
I've stared into Lincoln's cold eyes
They didn't reserve us any spaces.


I would not contaminate your stone with my name.
Your granite.
Crushed into granite; there is a speckle of Neutronium at the center of it all;
14 billion years. They say it is old. It's just a worthless number,
When you step out time out of mind.


You stepped out on me.
You cheated. We weren't done yet. You left all the good things,
And took my reason for being good.
I look for you in my dreams.
Sometimes I find you, and I can't bear it. I can't bear it cause the laughter is so loud, and the light is so bright.
The girls, they dance around us, and sing. They sing as we sing; spin together.
I sing now, it falls to the Earth like rocks.
There is one in my throat, love.


I want to build you a legacy;
A Zen garden built on quicksand.
A murmur in the tempest.
And you, your memory.
I slowly slip quietly into becoming a crazy old man, Scorned by all around me
Intolerable, unwanted, misunderstood....And I am so good with that.
Who could understand?
I haven't slept a handful of nights in two years,
And I fear it when it comes.
I fear the pain...of dreaming of the happiest times, to wake with such a start.
Bolt upright and gasp....


And once again, you're not there; to put my arm around....
1:37 AM.
And the rest of the night....



Is mine to regret