I know a secret.

You were messy,
I didn't care.
You were sad,
I didn't care.
You were needy,
I didn't care.
You were insecure,
I didn't care.
You were growing old,
I didn't care.
You were horrible with our money,
I didn't care.

You had two brown eyes that were so full of your soul,
More soul than I have ever found.
Than I have ever had.
My God, what were you?

Our children, they're sparks, they're jewels
On a crown, facets of you.
I have never been in love before you.
And I can't stop.
I do stupid things to make it better.
I know everyone has to hate me by now.
But they can't know. What would a man do to stay warm,
When the Sun dies,
And all of life is a mockery of what once was?

We both only wanted the same simple things.
To love God.
To love our girls.
To love each other.
To have fun, and joy, and peace.
And we had it all.
No retirement,
No golden years.
With a pillowcase dress and a skillet and a man
and a woman we had it all.

Everyone keeps trying to make it better.
Clean the messy house.
Go here.
Do this.
I don't want it better.
It was perfect.
And this beautiful chaos, that we created, and loved.
This prism of imperfect humans in perfect love
This little piece of dirty girls in ragged clothes
LAUGHING and dancing to a song no one knows
Quit trying to fix it.
Leave it alone.
Your phoenix is an insult
And a mockery